My Son better be a chef when he grows up!

I'm actually offended because Zion just bitched at me to put him back down in his bouncer so he could finish looking at the Barefoot Contessa. no, seriously. i was holding him and he was fussing and pushing away, so when i sat him back down in his bouncer, he hushed up and is now being very attentive at how to make a glazed chicken casserole. DISMISSED! lol

Can i just PLEASE hit the lottery?!

man oh man. i woke up this morning, first off, i'm PISSED that i have to go back to work. it has OFFICIALLY been 12 weeks since i had Zion but DAMN, couldn't they give me a DAY to kiss on my lil man before i have to join the stupid workforce again?! but noooo...so i have to go to work tonight! :( ANYWAY...so i have to wash some clothes for Zion to wear and put in his diaper bag for his babysitter since he is a spit up monster, and i get up and put him in his bouncer so i can go downstairs and throw his clothes in the dryer and guess what? Cable is cut off AGAIN! im actually pretty pissed cuz i just got paid friday and if i had known it was gonna be like that i coulda just paid it but now i dont have any money so im cable-less, and my shit so stupid i can't even get REGULAR channels....dammit. so dvd's it is. my niece said she would give me like 60 bucks tomorrow, so if she does, im gonna have to take my happy ass right to Wal-Mart and send a money-gram to Directv so me and Zion can have our Rachel Ray, cuz he is SO not feeling my movie selection....argh.

I hate this. i can't wait until Zion's dad decides to stop being a bitch-asshole and we can get this child support stuff set up. he is so fucking ignorant, cuz he is trying to wait until he HAS to pay, and its just making it worse because he is going to HAVE to pay for these past 3 months, and shit, me and Zion are this close to being homeless...i have to pay this cable bill..my cell phone is gonna get cut off ANYDAY now, which is beyond stressful considering i have a child to worry about...all this would be soooo much easier if Zion's dad would just MAN up and help us out..fucker...but thats ok, cuz karma is a bitch, and it's gonna bite him in the ass one day soon...

Whoops LOL

My dad just knocked on my door and i was like "aw MANNN come ON! i gave u my last 200 bucks, i thought i was thru with you for a while" all in my head...come to find out he came over to bring me a photo album with the pics from my baby shower in a nice photo album...whoops LOL..the bitch in me is heavy ha ha!

I got paid today. My rent is due on the 15th of every month, but as all my Facebook friend should know, my dad is my landlord and he is IN MY ASS about his rent, which is realllly shitty cuz ever since i had Zion i have been having trouble keeping up with rent. my check is only about 320 bi-weekly, and ANYONE should realize that thats about 640 a month, and with my rent being 350....not so much to pay bills with. so you would think that my dad, being you know, my DAD, would give me a break till i find a better paying job, or at LEAST till my child support kicks in and not call me every freaking payday harassing me about paying rent. he calls me EVERY WEEK asking me if my money situation has gotten any better. are u serious? ummm...NO. what the heck do u think? i'm still on maternity leave, the economy is shitty, and i'm still supporting me and Zion on 640 a damn month! i got gas, electric, cell, internet, cable, house phone, and buying diapers and stuff for my son. its enuff to SCREAM! but i dont. i just look at my lil love bug, especially when he looks like this:

and i feel better about everything lol. but ANYWAY...this blog is about payday....so my dad stressed the hell outta me today and i ended up going to his house today to give him my last measly $200 and hopefully get his ass off my back. so after i gave him the money, i was like "yeah dad, thats all i have to my person, except this $2 in my pocket." and i guess he started feeling bad, so he comes back in the kitchen and drops $50 on the table. so my step mom comes in and gets Zion...which was part of my plan...i took Zion with me, hoping that in the event of seeing his grandson it would make Dad take pity on my broke ass...and i guess it helped lol, but anyway, she offers me a pot pie..(delicious), a Pepsi (thirst-quenching) and a Drumstick, the ice cream (deeelightful). of course, if youre a broke ass like me you never turn down free food, so i enjoyed every last bit of it. We ended up staying at Dad's house for 4 hours and Zion got to bond with his step-gma, which was reallllly cute and sweet, so i think i'm gonna try and take Zion over there more. PLUS when i left, i guess Pat, my step ma, felt bad for my broke single mama plight, cuz she slipped me $40! so i guess i'm gonna hold on to that money for WHEN my cell phone gets cut off..hopefully i can stretch it till next paycheck, but now, if not, i got "feeling guilty" money. cha-ching......

FAT! 11 weeks and in 3's already...

My son is fat. At his last weigh in, when he was 8 weeks he was 13.9 lbs...yeah, so i'm sure he has to be at least 15 lbs by now...MAAAANNN....so i had to beg my mom to buy me a bag of pampers today cuz we were running REAL low, and i dont get my check till tomorrow, so she went and bought a box of Luvs..and here he is...note the belly hanging to the side, and over the top of the diaper...sometimes i wonder about me and my fellow bf'ing moms..(breastfeeding), "does our breastmilk have steroids in it or something?" LOL

First "Incident"...damn

Ok, so i'm sitting here holding Zion in my lap, whilst doing crap on Facebook and ParentsConnect. Zion just learned how to sit up kinda, and he also can hold his head up now, so i'm letting him look all around while im typing and he slings his head around and BAM! hit his head on my desk drawer..i am SUCH a bad mom cuz i was like "ooooh shit!" and grabbed his head with both my hands, and he pressed his face into my chest and made the "i'm bout to holler!" face and i was like "sorrysorrysorrysorry!" thank BOB he didn't cry, but he came close...and i totally laughed....which is just as bad as me laughing when he got his 2 month set of shots......i suck.

Yes, once again i'm copying you Barclay LOL

So i definitely got the idea for this from my friend Barclay. she just started a blog: http://www.barkles.blogspot.com/ (go to it and click ads! make her some money!) so i said "hey, self, you should totally do that too, not to steal her thunder or anything, but since i happen to find her COMPLETELY HILARIOUS, and not to say that im more funny (yeah me and myself have to rationalize stuff like this) BUT, Zion does funny stuff too and ya know...being a mom makes you realize that sharing the funny stuff that your baby does, makes it even more funny." so i guess mainly i'm gonna post pics and updates of the stuff my son does, or i HAPPEN to accidently do TO him lol. Hopefully everyone else thinks its just as funny, or cute so i don't feel like such a nerd.

So anywho, to start off...this is my son Zion:

and yes, he does look at me like this alot...like "mom, please, put the camera down..." but i cant help it! look at those eyes..he is such a boog! and by the way, i guess, since im probably going to use this word alot, boog means booger, but in a term of endearment. i got it from my bestie, who called her son that when he was a newborn, as in "booger bear" and we shortened it to boog...so ANYWHO..boog is the PINNACLE of cuteness..and thats TOTALLY what Zion is :)

and this is me:

Miss Ashley, on the phone, which is what i am prone to doing all day, or at least i was before i had my lil man. NOW im prone to staring at his cute lil cheekies and kissing him..but i digress..since this is primarily funny/cute pics, lets get on with it...oh let me give my lil disclaimer also...i LOVE to share gross pics (i.e. poop, spitup) so if you get weak from that type thing and don't find it as funny as I do...umm...SORRY?

So this morning, i fed Zion while he was sleeping, since he mostly sleeps in bed with mama, since i happen to be one of those paranoid new mamas that HAVE to see his chest moving and if he is in the crib i obviously CANT tell that he's still alive, plus, has anyone noticed that its not as bad a shock to your half sleep system to feed your child while they are half sleep and whiny rather than the full blown screaming that commences when they are in thier crib? so anyway, i fed him and no less than 4 mins later this is what i get:

sexy right?